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You said it! Readers' Responses: Opinions on Family What is a Family? (TOPICS, Issue 8) introduces this topic. Readers sent these comments. Send us your ideas.   Family is really very important for me. I have a good relationship between my family and I. We have five members, including parents, my sister, me and a cute cat. Whenever I get problems or feel frustrated, I think that my family is forever the best place for me to take a rest. I know whatever I have done, they would support me. My parents are not only "my parents", but also "my friends." I exchange my secrets and share my happy experiences with them. Unlike other teenagers, I like to chat with them. I love them to death. My younger sister is a cute and funny girl. Whatever she says make me laugh. I love every minute to be with her. I love my family more then anything in the world. I will treasure every moment that I get together with them! Emily, Taiwan Family, marriage. These two words make me feel so secure because I don't believe in divorce. As a family, I think the members should stick and help each other. For the children, I think the parents should never let their children leave their home at the year eighteen of age. Because at this age, I don't think they have enough knowledge to make good decision for their lives. In America the divorce rates are very high. It is very pitiful for the children that had divorced parent. These children have grown up without either the father or the mother environment. This situation would make them feel lonely because the others children have both parent. Finally, there are negative and positive aspects about marriage live. But in my opinion, as a family, we should always love and help each other in many ways as we can. Quyen Trinh, Vietnam Family is the cell of the society. They are always with us, especially when we really need them. I think the people who get a divorce are like little bad cells that could cause a big cancer. They are dangerous for the rest of the good cells. I do not agree with divorce; we should try to be together forever because when we get married, we say "be together forever", so we must do what we say. Divorce is the beginning of society's destruction. Maggie, Venezuela It seems to me that American families are not strong families. In my culture, we understand the exact meaning of family and home, and we know how to respect our parents, relatives and our friends. You can't always see clearly what the relationship is between parents and their children. In American families, children leave their families when they become 18 years and it seems that some of them don't even try to see their families again and usually say this is the meaning of freedom. Having freedom in my society means respecting yourself and others. Our parents need us to be around them, not go too far away from them. Esraa Dawood, Middle East Almost everyday at my office, I would go to the websites on parenting/family. I just want to be a good mother which I think I haven't been able to achieve yet. I am a mother of two daughters, have a husband and am staying with my parents-in-law (my parents have passed away). So, that is the type of family which I am living in right now. To me,when talking about family and solutions to family problems , there is no specific answer and specific tips which are going to suit every family. As mentioned earlier, I have tried all sorts of parenting techniques but none of them could produce good results. You see, it takes all the members in the family's cooperation in order to build a happy family. When everyone put their effort to make it happen, all the tips and techniques will come naturally. To me, as I have seen it, it works that way. There is no point doing it on your own. You will end up in frustration and your frustration will lead to anger and it will just ruin everything. So now, the big Question of how to everybody's cooperation. This is very tough. For example, if you look at my family, which has other extra people in it -parents-in-law. You must think that the best solution is to find another place where only my husband and children are there without other intervention. Well, that is not the answer because there are a lot of family matters to be considered. As mentioned earlier, the solution is not the same for everyone. What I have done is to give and take with (more of giving it seems) everyone so that when I suggested something (on the tips), the suggestion can be accepted easily. Another thing that I have done is to believe in my instinct and be honest to myself that the thing is good for everyone. Nur Faizah, Malaysia If you have a family and have kids,you should keep the commitment for it. Maybe you will become bored when you feel every day life is prosaic, but no pay no gain. If you have the sense of responsibility for the family, someday,when your family is much better because of your hard work compared with those family without care, then your life is regretless. Or if you feel you really don't have the responsibility for this, then don't give the birth to baby. Lulu, China Family is our basic social unit. It has undergone significant changes over the last century. More than ever, modern family has a lot to cope with compared to family during the golden days. Today, family faces more pressures such as money worries and drug abuse. Also, relationship by taking away quality family time which should be forging warm and loving relationship. Furthermore, in today's challenging time, family no longer has a clear job function for its members. Reversed roles where the man brings up the children and the woman is the breadwinner is becoming quite common. As a human being I cannot imagine living in this world without family. This is because family is the most valuable aspect of my life. I believe, without family I am not a complete person. Who is going to teach me all the basic values in life such as helping people, abiding to rules and being good to others. In fact, without family I would be a lonely individual. I will not have a shoulder to cry on and not able to talk about fear and dream. Also, family is the most important in my life not solely for the fact that family provides love and relationship but also never to forget money and other necessities in life. Zainita Binti Zainuddin, Malaysia Send us your ideas about family. Return to: You Said It | Home Page TOPICS Online Magazine ©1997-2008 - Sandy and Thomas Peters - topics.mag@gmail.com